6.06.2013

Sentences You Never Thought You'd Say

When I was in high school, I went to the mall with my friend Matt. We were sharing a meal from an upscale salad bar when I accidentally bumped into his hand over the plate. "Sorry!" I said. He was confused, and asked why I was apologizing. "I hit you with my crab cake."

And then we proceeded to get the most incredible case of the giggles, because really? When else are you ever going to have the opportunity to utter the sentence I hit you with my crab cake??

Ever since, whenever circumstances allow for some inane, context-dependent sentence to be spoken, I always remember that crab cake. I wish I'd kept track of them through the years, because there are some doozies.

The other day we were reorganizing the toy collection. It was quite a project; we brought every single toy we own into the living room and spent over an hour sorting out all the little pieces that had been separated from their like parts. I picked up something I couldn't identify and asked Ben what it was. His response?

"That's part of the duck underpants."

I think I'm going to use the comments of this blog post as a running list when the next wildly random sentence emerges from the ordinary glory of life.

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